The Art of Reflection

Dear Family and Friends,

This post is written to notify you that I have been fully ordained since 6th July 2008 at Santi Forest Monastery as a Theravadin Monk of the Thai Forest tradition.

Santi Forest Monastery is in Malaysia, Johore. Due to visa constraints as I am a Singaporean. I am required to return to Singapore every month to get my passport stamped and stay in Palelai Buddhist temple (at Bedok) for a few days before heading back to Malaysia again.

I have also relinquished my handphone as I don't really get to use it much in Malaysia. If you wish to contact me, you may email me at: thubtenningje@hotmail.com if you would like to request for the temple's telephone number where i can be reached.

I took this time in Palelai to update this info in hope to create less misunderstanding amongst my contacts who still assume that i am still a layperson.

I'd like to take this opportunity again to seek forgiveness from all of you if i have done anything through body, speech and mind that might create unhappiness.

Also like to thank all those who sent me regards during my ordination and those who came down personally to witness the ordination ceremony.


With metta,
Phra. Atiphalo

There seem to be no end... so i decided to put a stop and let everything go.

I've been trying to complete my "last task" before going to Santi during Vesak. I learnt that we do not need to complete mundane stuff for it is impermanent and not really mine at the first place/in the end. So just leave it as it is... When its time to go, nothing else matters.

It was such a coincidence yesterday when i was sending a notification to MINDEF regarding my overseas trip to Malaysia, Bhante Ong gave me a call, informing me that the abbot of Santi, Ajahn Kheng, would be conducting a retreat this weekend at Palelai temple and advised me to talk to Ajahn Kheng. I might be able to hitch a free ride to Santi together with him.

Many believe its the end of the world based on some "reliable" predictions... Even Bhante Mahinda mentions about this year and told us to prepare by practicing well. For those who doesn't know what its all about, you can watch this vid:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5iZ54i2rCZk


Yea, since im into American politics... i came across several interesting documentaries which depicts 2012 as not the end of the physical world, but rather a day of world domination. Check out these vids:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=plcPHEXM5Fs
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vuBo4E77ZXo
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_dmPchuXIXQ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S5xtjxRySbg


In Buddhism, the suttas mentioned about a wheel turning monarch that is going to conquer the world not through force... I wonder whether it will be this soon...

Watched Iron Man on a Friday night @ Yishun GV cinema. Very cool movie. I won't write a standard review cuz the internet's full of them...

It has a subtle message to its content though. About the war in the Middle East. Its all about some American war mongers trying to make profit out of the weapons industry. I guess its been like that for a long time since before the gulf war... Testing their new weaponry on the actual war and showing off to the world how powerful their weapons are... then selling it to other countries who covet them...

If you're a Marvel fan, then you'll get to understand how SHIELD manages to fund its high tech base up in the air after watching this movie...

As for the storyline, this version is definitely much logical than some old cartoon version whereby he made the armour with the help of a magician... all thanks to the current terrorist issue.

Moral of the story 1: Learn to do the artillery drill well. Prone on the ground facing away from the bomb and cover your neck with your hands... Otherwise the shrapnel will enter your heart and you might need to live on batteries for the rest of your life.

Moral of the story 2: Keep spare batteries in case you lose it...

Moral of the story 3: Right livelihood... avoid trading weaponry, living beings, intoxicants, poison and anything unethical. You don't have to wait till you are close to death to realise the wrongdoings you have done and start to change(but usually that's the case... ppl only wake up until smth drastic happens)

Moral of the story 4: Make sure you make good company of friends. You'll never know when you need help... Maintain good relationships and try not to break the trust of your friends.

Moral of the story 5: Work hard + work smart = success in completing your objective

Be sure to stay till the very end of the credits which im sure many would have left their seats... well if you have missed it, you can take a look at this vid:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QGgLZFdINpg&feature=related

They'll probably come up with Iron Man 2 featuring War Machine and start the Avengers movie...

I remembered those days in primary school when i watched the Iron Man cartoons... brings back great memories in the arcades. I even made a costume of Iron Man(actually its cupboard paper boxes... talking abt recycling...) during my secondary school's NPCC annual camp.

Comic heroes = Spiritual role models???
Thanks to all the comic artists for inspiring billions of people, including myself, for sharing your hard work and creativity.

This is not a movie review on 'Iron Man' although im going to watch it this Friday... It is about a friend that i knew of and an incident which made me think of it as an irony.

This friend which i met long ago persuaded me against the idea of getting ordained and encouraged me to lead a happy married life. During those days, like any average young man, he was desperately seeking for a girlfriend. Given our different backgrounds, i kinda ignored what he "advised" me. I still thanked him for his "advise" since he meant well.

Recently, he chatted with me via msn and told me of his personal problems of breakup with a girl and sought for some advise... At that instant, it seemed to me like an irony that he should be seeking advise from me with regards to managing relationships even though he knows im planning to become a monk. Gave him some advise which i learnt from monks' talks(irony...) which managed to help him. Due to the respect of privacy i'll not disclose the full conversation but list down some meaningful quotes being mentioned...

"A good relationship is one that both sides respect each other as they really are...
and not expectation of what you want ur partner to be"

"A lasting relationship is when both your thoughts are on par and have same objectives in life"

"When you are with somebody, give 100% attention to them...
not on some imaginary images from the past"

I hope he sees the value in the lives of contemplatives who live a celibate life, free from attachments and have a clear mind to give useful advise to help people of all walks of life. To others, it may seem like a sacrifice for these contemplatives... but to them its a reward to experience the bliss of freedom.

I aspire to be such a contemplative one day... understand one's mind, understand all the problems of the world.

Went to Palelai last Sunday and talked with Bhante Ong regarding ordination. Guess what... he asked me to follow him to Santi forest monastery in Johore to get some conditioning. After when im ready, they'll send me to Thailand for 5 years to get ordained and to train under a good master. Lol... back to square one.

Bhante called me earlier this morning and told me there was a shuttle bus from Palelai to Santi this coming Thursday and asked if i could follow him... I wanted to go but i had to reluctantly reject this trip as i've got a community service event this Sunday to see through. He then told me the next shuttle will be 2 weeks later and will confirm with me again.

So currently im on standby for activation. Have to free myself from making further commitments and let everything go. Man its like preparing for death again... Reminds me of a practice i learnt from Bhante Mahinda...

Everyday when we sleep it is like dying, what is the last thought in our mind? Are we upset, stressed or relaxed? So try to seek refuge, forgiveness and get into the state of lovingkindness.
When we wake up it is like being reborn, what is the first thought in our mind? Are we grumpy or happy? So try to get up with lovingkindness.
In the middle of the day when we get tired it is like ageing, so age with wisdom. Maintain mindfulness throughout the day so the dying process would be easier.

Im back in Singapore on the 9th April... Some may ask why I have returned 1 month ahead of schedule. The reason is because there will be no Sangha left in Aloka. Sister Sumitra flew back to Singapore at the end of March to visit her mother while Venerable Mahinda had an invitation to fly to USA on the 10th April for some scientific research. Bhante(means 'teacher' - that is what we normally refer Venerable Mahinda) was very kind to open his door for me to return if i have not yet found a place to ordain. Even if i got ordained at some other places, I could still look for him if i had problems... Such a great person.

Both Bhante and Sister are really great meditation masters and i really learnt a lot from them during my stay in Aloka. However great they might be, there are other factors to consider that i never thought that i would encounter which might be obstacles to my ordination or progress along the spiritual path (for those of you who are keen to get ordained maybe you could add them into your checklist as well):-

1) Bhante is a missionary monk and travels a lot... that's fine but he has no other monks under him that i could seek guidance and learn from when he is not around.

2) Visa complications overseas

3) Health issues - I cant stand the cold weather in Australia

That led me to conclude that im a fool to search for places to get ordained overseas when i could get ordained right here i the local temples where the conditions are all there. Though may not be very conducive for practice due to the busy city temple life(that was what i thought of last time)... I was proved wrong during my stay in Aloka when they too had many services for the local community and had many projects to keep them busy. Despite all the hectic schedules, they took it as an opportunity to train their mindfulness in their daily activities. I too, was given many duties to do and only had the early mornings before breakfast and the nights to do some quiet sitting (not much of a retreat eh?).

I had to do things that i never got a chance to do in Singapore like:-
-Cutting grass, weeding, mulching and planting like a gardener(kinda fun driving a grass cutting tractor)
-Digging drains, wheelbarrowing soil, carrying rocks like a construction worker(ok not too bad cuz that is what we guys normally do in the army)
-Feeding 5 cats, 2 ponds or fishes and a guanna(a giant lizard which resembles to a smaller version of the komodo dragon) like a zookeeper(i love animals so its rather enjoyable)
-Prepare food like an assistant chef(man i suck at this cuz i don't cook... normally i juz buy from coffeeshop)
-Clearing rubbish and bringing the bins out for the rubbish collectors to collect(those who live in HDB flats won't get to do this)
-Sweeping leaves like a road sweeper

There is so much work to do that i had no time to shower daily... I had to shower once every 2-3 days, wear the same set of clothes for 1 week and only had time to wash my clothes once a week. On the other hand, the other lay residents staying in Aloka shower daily and wash their clothes as frequent as i take a shower.

Initially i was whining and complaining in my mind for the overwhelming work and lack of welfare... then i realised that these negative thinking pattern was my weakness. The mind likes to dwell in the past experiences and project into the future. These little hardships are part of the training to create conditions to stir my mind and get me upset. The challenge is how to overcome this problem and silence the mind from thinking and rethinking. This reminded me of the similarities of the training in the first Karate Kid movie...

That is where the practice of mindfulness comes in. To be just aware of the activities in the present moment and not project the mind into the past and future. This is no easy task to accomplish and perhaps it requires a whole lifetime of practice to be really at peace in the present moment all the time. A head on rehabilitation approach to overcome this bad habit... that is the only way. No short cuts to free the mind... it's all about practice.